Mavs v Bucks Preview

The Milwaukee Bucks (4-6) will take on the defending champion Dallas Mavericks (6-5) tonight in Dallas.

Dallas has struggled a bit this year, lost some key players (Tyson Chandler most notably). But they are getting it together. They just spent some time with Obama, and they are coming off back to back road victories, without J Kidd. A lot of savvy veterans on this squad, and they will give the Bucks a lot of trouble. All four Bucks wins have come on their home court.

Let’s take a look at the matchups:

1. Delonte West v Brandon Jennings (PG)

Kidd is questionable with a back injury, so we’ll likely get the lefty on lefty point guard matchup. Five things I know about Delonte: 1 – He banged Lebron’s mom (or did Lebron bang his mom?). 2 – He was talking a lot about working at Home Depot during the lockout (or maybe he actually worked there). 3 – At one point he was driving around with a bunch of shotguns. 4 – He claimed that he couldn’t go to the white house for the Mavs president visit because of his criminal record. 5 – He has a history of mental problems. Good chance Delonte will be dead and miss the game.

Advantage: Player formerly known as the Branchise.

2. Vince Carter v Carlos Delfino (SG)

Whoa, Vincanity has made his way to the Mavs. Vince isn’t really vincanity anymore though, hasn’t been for years. Remember when he was at NC and was going to be the next Jordan. That was right before or after Jerry Stackhouse was supposed to be the next Jordan. Stack and Vince both solid, but tough billing to live up to. Vince still has enough Vincanity for this matchup though.

Advantage: The player formerly known as Vincanity.

3. Shawn Marion v Stephen Jackson (SF)

The Matrix was a a cool nickname back when the Matrix movies were out and everybody was doing shit all fast and freaky. Marion played like he was Neo and could pull some crazy shit. Now, the red pill is setting in, and he is just Shawn Marion again. But he is still solid. Marion’s crazy, quick release, from the chest, push shot still amazes me. I can’t decide if it is a thing of beauty or the ugliest shot I’ve ever seen. It is well known that Stephen Jackson hated those fucking Matrix movies, had no idea what the fuck was going on by the third film, and will be motivated to crush the Matrix.

Advantage: Stephen Jackson

4. Dirk Nowitski v John Leuer (PF)

He should have taken the sides in more, and gone with a full Ivan Drago look.

Remember when Dirk had the high top fade? Money. According to Wikipedia, Dirk is one of only five NBA players to win a championship while being the only All star on his team. Dirk will win his matchup with Leuer, but he won’t be as dominant as he otherwise would be. Leuer’s strength and stingy white guy from Wisconsin defense will keep Dirk somewhat limited.

Advantage: Dirkinator.

5. Brendan Haywood v Andrew Bogut (C)

I’m not sure how this is possible, but Brendan Haywood recorded the first triple double in North Carolina’s history in 2000. This was 18 points, 14 boards, and 10 BLOCKS. Haywood will not record a triple double against Bogut.

Advantage: Aussie, Aussie, Aussie.

BUCKS WIN – I mean, they’ve lost six in a row on the road. They have to win one eventually.

Unrelated, comical picture, happens to contain the Matrix.

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