Here’s a list of shit I simply hate. If you gotta have love, then you gotta have some hate. Plain and simple.
1. Mother fuckers that post there daily tasks on facebook.
2. Oprah. Stupid bitch.
3. Spike Lee. You are not relevant, no one cares. STFU.
4. Nancy Pelosi. Right, the president doesn’t control gas prices. Check. But George Bush caused high gas. FU
5. Hippies. Pretty soon you will be in a nursing home. STFU.
6. Dr. Oz. Almonds are good for you. Don’t eat cake. And quit wearing surgeon clothes on TV.
7. Angelina Jolie. Gain some weight, quit adopting kids from around the world.
8. Prince Fielder. Fuck you. Fat ass piece of cornrow shit.
9. Wisconsin Dells. Piss filled infested water with hairy fat men and women and a shit load of kids constantly screaming in a really loud hot atmosphere. FUN! not.
10. The recall effort. So worth the money. FUCK YOU.
11. Professional hockey. NO ONE FUCKING CARES.
12. Callers to the Jim Rome show. Use your normal voice and talk like a normal person not some Jim Rome freak-o. Idiots.
13. Vikings fans. Actually they are funny. Scratch that.
14. Walmart. Big ass store full of plastic shit and no service. Why the fuck do people shop there? Fuck you.
15. Bad movies. Too many too mention. Waste 2 hours of my life watching some crap for no reason that makes no sense. Recently? Again, I don’t even know where to start, I am sorry, nothing further.
16. Enjoying every second and stuff that tells us we should. Dude, I realize God gave us a gift of life. Sweet, but sometimes you just gotta hate. And if you don’t you feel guilty making you stressed and worried about not liking every second. Hate for a little bit, move on and enjoy it. Easy.
17. Panera Bread. Fucking ham sandwich is 9 bucks. FUCK YOU!
18. Noodles. see #17.
19. People that bitch at waitresses and bartenders and tip like shit. Don’t leave your house if this is how you are going to act jack wagon!
20. Coffee shops that serve your coffee slow on purpose because ya know, it’s a coffee shop. Fuck you.
21. Warm Beer. Better than no beer I guess.
22. Ordering some red wine and loathing it. Thanks for that. Shit.
23. Ben from the bachelor. Dude you suck so bad. It’s your 5 seconds in the light with 30 hot chicks and all you care about is if they are “opening up to you.”
24. Jerry Seinfeld after the show got canceled. And I love Jerry. Same for you Elaine.
25. Allen Iverson. Still.
26. Packers defense. What the fuck is going on?
27. People that hate you but to your face kiss your ass. FUCK YOU.
28. People that read “minutes from the last meeting.” STFU.
29. LOL. Hate that. Who does that?
30. People that don’t get back to my e-mails or texts in less than 20 seconds. This is 2012, get your ass connected.
31. China. Yeah the whole country. Fuck you.
32. Getting old. Fucking hate getting old. shit.
I feel so much better.
– Roste Beefe